A Bit About "Love"

I find the events that have unfolded today to be incredibly troubling. I find the things we choose to care about to be incredibly troubling. I find that fact that so many people are claiming "Love won" today to be the most troubling of all. Do we even know what love is anymore? It has nothing to do with sexual preference or even to do with what is legal and illegal. Do we truly and sincerely even know what love is? Love can't be bound by laws...it's not dependent on a system of beliefs.

I had no level of interest or care or concern for this Supreme Court ruling until I started hearing this phrase on the radio and seeing it running across social media. Now I am deeply saddened. Love didn't win today. Love was subverted today. Love is a force that binds humans together. This is a principle that no sane person can argue with, regardless of faith or belief system. It is universal. Had love been allowed to have it's chance, we would have come to an equilibrium as a people, on our own, without the dictation of 5 people in black robes. Had love won today we would have needed no Supreme Court Decision whatsoever.

"We the People, in order to form a more perfect Union..." These are the first words written in the constitution. Have we forgotten what these words ACTUALLY mean? At their core, they have nothing to do with country or society, but with a way that people must stand together and interact.

More and more I'm convinced that we as a people spend more time talking about left government and right government and religion and non-religion and tolerance and ideology than we do remembering that we are a people. More importantly, we are a free people with a great and heavy responsibility to maintain that freedom. How did all of that go again?

We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.

This is the entire premise of the constitution. It's why we have a constitution in the first place. It's why we have Government in the first place. It's why we are a society. Why we call ourselves Americans. It sets us apart from the other nations of the world. Let me break this down.

A more perfect union is a place where we, as a people, are unified. Where we help each other. Where we live together in peace (peace...doesn't it talk about that too?) and harmony. Does it mean complete agreement? No. Does it mean one system of beliefs? No. It means one people, working together. A more perfect union.

Justice. What's that? Justice is the Rule of Law. Justice binds a society into one unity. A system of laws is necessary for freedom and for laws to exist, laws must be enforced. But it goes deeper than that. Justice also require morality, and a willingness to defend that morality. Now I'm not talking about the semantics of morality here based on what someone can do in their bedroom or what is acceptable at the dinner table. I'm talking about laws that govern the human race and define its prosperity. Integrity, service, tolerance, freedom of conscience, procreation, are all things that humans must live by if they wish to prosper. This cannot be argued with any merit. History shows us time and again societies lacking in these ideals and how they crumble to pieces.

Insurance of Domestic Tranquility is not a 18th century endorsement of Obamacare. It's the idea that we should be at peace, one with another. Ferguson, MO? That's not Domestic Tranquility. Baltimore? Nope. Charleston, SC? Nope. And it's not about guns either. There were plenty of guns when this preamble was written. Here's the thing. There are terrible people out there. There is evil in the world. There always has been and there always will be. It is our job to watch out for one another and protect one another. When we can discuss our views without anger or malice, then we have established domestic tranquility. When many belief systems can live together without threatening each other, we have domestic tranquility. When 5 people dictate the laws of an entire nation, while the nation engages in a war of words fought over a million battlefields in the digital world, our domestic tranquility is a pathetic joke. Certainly there is no place for love in that world.

 Along the same lines, when our domestic tranquility is threatened, it is our duty to provide for our common defense. Our common defense. Not my defense against people who hate me. Not your defense against people who hate you. Not defense of the left against the right or defense of the straight against the gay. It is a common defense. That which threatens one of us threatens all of us. Remember, we are a people. Love isn't just a passive thing that we all have for one another. It is shown in our actions, and in this specific regard, it is most necessary. There are few more potent acts of love than the defense of those who do not necessarily agree with you. In this time there are many threats to our nation, within and without. How are we to stand against these threats if we are not willing to defend one another? I reiterate, in this world full of warring words and ideals, there is little place for love, and certainly no common defense to be found.

Promotion of general welfare is simply a fancy call for us to help one another. This is not limited by a system of beliefs. It is universal, regardless of our beliefs. If you'll recall, the inalienable rights we have, as declared by our nation's founding fathers, were enumerated as "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness." What could be more appropriately defined as general welfare than our individual ability to help one another pursue happiness? No good person desires to be unhappy. I truly believe that no good person desires for another person to be unhappy. Does this mean that in a perfect society we all sit quietly and say nothing so we don't offend each other? Absolutely not. In a free society we should be able to freely exchange ideas in a manner that enlightens us all and leads us all to our own measure of individual happiness. If your idea of happiness is marriage to someone of the same gender, it is your right to pursue that. That pursuit happens to be in conflict with my religious beliefs. Does that mean we cannot abide together in the same society? Absolutely not! It does, however, mean that we should exchange our ideas on the matter and do our best to promote the general welfare for both of us, so that I can continue my religious beliefs and you can continue your pursuit of happiness as a married homosexual. You don't get a free pass from promoting my welfare simply because you disagree with my religious beliefs, and I don't get the right to disregard your welfare because my religion doesn't condone your lifestyle choices.

And lastly but not leastly, we must ensure the security of the blessings of liberty for ourselves and our prosperity. Liberty, at its heart, is a protection of our freedom to choose. Not freedom to do whatever we want, but freedom to define our lives as we wish. Do you wish to become President? Play Basketball in the NBA? Build a massive corporate empire? Save a species of animal? Open a cafe in a big city? Write a book? Star in a movie? What we make of ourselves is what defines us, and our opportunity to make of ourselves what we choose to strive for is what makes us Americans. They say that the American Dream is a financial one, but is that not simply an understanding that with financial success comes ones ability to do whatever they desire? America is the Land of Opportunity. Ever has it been thus, and ever shall it be so long as we continue to maintain our own liberty, the price of which is this Union we belong to and the responsibility as its people to ensure its prosperity.




A government is nothing more than a construct made up of people. Our government is set up to be run "by the people, for the people." And in this regard, we have lost our way. We cannot separate ourselves from this government. We cannot allow a decision of 5 non-elected justices to define our roles in this society as a people. If we as a people had been behaving properly in the first place and operating as a functioning society, this decision would have never come to our attention! Homosexuality is not a new thing. The desires of homosexuality are not new to society. Their survival as a group is not dependent on this Supreme Court Ruling. This decision matters very little to them in reality, and even less to the rest of us as a society. What does matter is that we as a people let the government get involved in the first place. The sad truth is that this Supreme Court decision is simply evidence of a society that must pay for its own mistakes. 

The instructions given to us as a people by our founding fathers provide a simple road map to prosperity. They took great care in compiling these ideals, and many gave their lives to set up this Union in such a way that we would have the opportunity to even live these ideals. And at the heart of all of these instructions is the concept of love, that binding force that ties us together as human beings. When love wins out, I believe that government is minimally necessary (regardless of how big or small you think it should be) and when we are operating as we should as a society these kinds of events have no place among us.

So when you think of the events that transpired today, perhaps you ought to think a little less about the idea that homosexual men and women are legally allowed to marry one another and proclaim "love won out!" Instead, perhaps you ought to think about the blow this decision was to our society, and the subtle reminder it is that we have lost our way. Indeed we have forgotten what it even means to love as a people must, in order to remain prosperous.

A Bit About Me

This post is dedicated to my family. I love them, though they don't often hear from me. The truth is that I miss being a little kid, when it was easy to give a hug and hard to feel the weight of the world on my shoulders. Some day I will remember how to be a good little brother. But right now I'm just working on being me.

What causes someone who never shuts up and always has something to write about to neglect a venue such a this for several years? Many would claim writer's block. Or a business schedule. Or a waning interest. Or some other excuse of "oh I always meant to but..." 

The truth is, I haven't written on here for years because somewhere along the way I lost the courage to be honest and strip down the thoughts in my head into a cohesive message of what I was seeing in the world around me. I started this blog as an outlet for my insight. As a little window into the way I see things for the simple pleasure of anyone who wanted to take a peek and see if they could identify or profit from my tiny little view of the world. 

That only works as long as I'm aware of what I'm seeing. I can only open up and give those little insights if I have the presence of mind to actually open my own eyes and see first. For too long now my focus has been solely inward. I've been selfish and egotistical in the ways that make me very disappointed now looking back. 

It's easy to make excuses for ourselves. It's even easier to justify our circumstances or make ourselves feel like we're doing the best we can.

But the truth is we're not doing the best we can. I'm not. Perhaps you are, and if you honestly are, then I salute you and applaud you with as much respect as I can muster. For me, though, the sad fact remains that I have yet to achieve "doing the best I can." Maybe I'm just too full of myself to accept that I'm a lesser mortal. If that's the case, then I fear I have much more learning to do than seems currently evident. 

Evidence from my life, though, suggests that for various reasons I have allowed myself to be blocked or unmotivated or discouraged from achievements that were well within my reach. For whatever reasons applied at the time (there have been many over the years), I've made the decisions that resulted in failure.

I have to own up to that. With that ownership, though, comes power that I have never before experienced. Sooner or later, I will most assuredly be at my best, where I can claim with all honesty that I am doing the best I can. This is because I am learning to overcome. 

It takes awareness, which requires openness and honesty. It also requires a great deal of humility, and this I have had much trouble with. You see, when you are honest with yourself, and unashamed of your flaws and unwilling to feel regret for your mistakes, people will find issue with you. They will taunt you and seek to ridicule you and make you feel like you are often walking the wrong path. And that's okay. Just as you are broken and trying to figure yourself out, so too are they trying to both figure you out, and figure themselves out. The truth is, we have our own path to walk. Stay firm on your path, and sooner or later you will find the voices fading into the distance as your path takes you onward. Humility is simply a lack of concern for how dirty your boots get while you walk your path. Is it not? 

For a long time I felt that my biggest failure was in letting myself be scared. I thought that I had let fear get the best of me. Every time I saw failure in my life, right there next to it was something that I had been afraid of that was holding me back. 

I have been wrong. As I've pondered many of the mistakes I've made, I've come to realize that I was fearless. I made the mistakes that I did because in reality I wasn't afraid of the possible consequences. I am still fearless. Very little scares me. Not death, not ridicule, not shame or even failure. 

The truth is that I have been apathetic and lazy. Every aspect of my life where I messed up, at the end of the day, happened because I didn't care. I'm a smart guy, and I'm resourceful. I can do anything I set my mind to, so long as I take to time to learn about it and grasp an understanding of it. Watch me take something apart some time. It's a long process. I have to analyze everything and understand where it fits. That's a hard path to take.

When you take a hard path, you have to be prepared for the stumbling blocks along the way. There are walls and trenches and puddles. Sometimes you get stuck. Sometimes you get hurt. You have to overcome. You can't overcome when you don't care.

I had to overcome many obstacles. I still do.

I had to figure out why I needed to keep moving forward.

I had to find out what I believed and what I cared about and what I wanted.

I had to figure out what path I walked. And more than that, I've had to figure out why I walk that path.

These last few years have been hard, and though I've made many mistakes, I have very few regrets because, in reality, they've helped me learn. Now I've put the puzzle together and I have a deep and complete understanding of who I am and what I seek. I know what I stand for and what I believe in, and I know what I want out of life.

At the end of the day I know some of the finer details may change. I know I will make more mistakes. But I am also confident in claiming that I will never again lose my way, for I know of a surety the path that I am on is the right path.

My boots are going to get dirty. And I don't care. I have much to give those around me, and I've come to believe in the power of my own potential. Understanding gives me strength and confidence.

The truly beautiful thing, though, is that I'm not unique or privileged in this blessing of strength and understanding. It is there for all of us to find if we seek it. We have a promise, that if we do all we can and follow a straight and narrow path-- a path marked for us by one who came to Earth and overcame all-- we will overcome everything that stands in our way.

I am not alone in this promise. That, to me, is an incredibly special thing.

A Bit About Lines

Since last I wrote I've had a great deal on my mind. There have been several changes in my life, and the shifting of multiple circumstances, all of which I feel have led me to write this blog post. I've been meaning to write again for some time, but in mulling over different topic ideas, I wasn't sure what I wanted to write. Normally I would try to circumvent this problem and just spend a post or two rambling, getting myself out of my creative rut and back into the swing of things. But every time I sat down to put words to my thoughts, things just didn't feel right. Something was off. So I would putter around for a line or two and then decide I should probably go do something else before I got frustrated and lost all hope of writing with inspiration.

I think it's fair to say that it is part of our human nature to draw lines, both physical and metaphorical. We draw a line to easily figure out how to connect Point A to Point B. We draw lines to divide things... "This side of the line is mine; that side of the line is yours." And in our lives we draw lines to signify and end or a beginning.

Perhaps we draw a finish line to show the end of a race. Perhaps it's a decision to give up this activity because there are other things out there to spend time on. Every one of us, day in and day out, has to interact with lines. We create and destroy these lines, or sometimes we circumvent or change these lines.

The trouble we get in to (at least the trouble that I get into) is in determining where to draw the lines. I'm not a perfect guy, and I don't have perfect judgement. Well, see, lines require judgement. So inevitably, I'm gonna draw lines in wrong places every so often. And by every so often I really mean all the time. That idea drives me crazy. I'm the kind of fellow that is very flexible. It takes a lot to set me on edge, aggravate me, or otherwise convince me to lose my cool. But that means that it's hard for me to draw lines at all, much less draw lines in the right places. I'd like to think that nowadays I have a pretty good moral barometer, and a decent sense of logical and illogical. So I try to make correct decisions, which really is what lines are. However as I said, I'm imperfect. My logic is often imperfect, and honestly my whole outlook and perspective is usually imperfect.

Now I'm pretty sure that I'm not the only one in this boat, so to all of you fellow imperfect people out there, I have some advice as to how I've come to try to draw lines a little more successfully.

As a brief aside, to those of you perfect people out there reading this...go read a different blog.

First things first...and this has been the toughest thing for me to learn, I promise:

Don't sweat the mistakes.

 We ARE imperfect. And we make mistakes. It SUCKS! But the truth of the matter is, mistakes are made to be learned from. The hard part is the consequences that come from making mistakes. Enter the epic metaphor...

Making decisions is like stretching out a rubber band and tying it off at both ends. (Don't worry about why we're tying rubber bands in the first place. It's irrelevant for my purposes right now! You silly over-analytical critics.) If you make the right decision, you pick a good solid rubber band, and you tie some pretty good knots and it's solid. It'll stretch and bend and pull a little here and there as it gets pulled one way or another, but it stays put and all is good.

Sometimes, though, we don't know our rubber bands well enough. Sometimes they're a bit older than we thought they were. Sometimes we tied the wrong knot at one end or the other. Perhaps we just tied the rubber band at the wrong time and you got distracted before you could finish tying it. SNAP!! There it goes...flying off to the opposite corner of the room, or nailing you right on the most annoyingly sensitive spot on your finger. Hurray for consequences! For one reason or another, you rubber band couldn't hold it's place. Well now you've gotta go hunt down where it flew off to...or apologize to the person it snapped on the nose...or suck on the welt you now have on your finger.

But do you go and forever vow to never ever again pick up rubber band tying?! In all reality you probably should, because not everyone spends their time tying rubber bands to things. However, you're the center of an epic metaphor at the moment, so what do you actually do? Well first you deal with the broken rubber band. Find it, kiss your finger and make it feel better, or go kiss the other person's nose and make them feel better. Then you analyze what happened.

And then you realize that your decision really wasn't the only one you're going to make ever. There's gonna be other rubber bands to tie! (For reasons likely much sillier than the last ones that had you tying those rubber bands.)

That knowledge is what's at the heart of being able to keep moving on despite making the wrong decisions. You can't let yourself get caught up in the moment and overwhelmed with one decision that is looming over your head, or that you made and screwed up on. There's still a lot of life ahead of you, and that means more lines to draw, which means if nothing else you'll have more opportunities to try again and do better the next time.

Piece of advice Number The Next One

Don't try to dig your way to China.

I promise I'm not being obnoxious with this thought. As a kid you get the epic idea "Hey, I wanna go see the other side of this big world, and instead of being dumb and like everyone else who walks around the globe to see it, I'm going to dig straight through the planet and pop out in China! Straight lines are the BEST!!!"

Then you grow up. And you learn that the world is really really Really Really REALLY REALLY big. And it's also filled with epically hard rocks and then really really hot lava through the middle that would take some kind of epic equipment that only exists in the mind of a really epic sci-fi writer. So like most little kids your dream has been shattered. You mope around for a little bit, and then move on to the next epic dream that seems a little more achievable than that one.

Well some grown-ups are a bit silly and forget that they're grown-ups, and decide to dig their way to China again. They set a goal, draw a line, and make a decision that they're going from Point A to Point [China] and it's straight through all the rock and lava and whatever that lies in their path. "I'm epic!" quoth they, "I've got the right sorts of equipment, I can dig my way to Point [China]!!"

Well here's the problem with that. First off, they miss all of the incredible sights that they find along the journey. Curvy lines, and lines that zig and zag, will still get you where you want to go, or accomplish what you want to accomplish. Perhaps someone is driving you crazy, and you really need to communicate with them what's upsetting you and tell them that they need to fix it. Does that mean you throw down the straight line, look at them and say "You're a jerk, you're driving me crazy, you gotta cut it out!"? Well...probably not. Anyone who knows anything about communication knows that saying exactly what you think at the moment you think it is not always the best way to communicate.

Anyway, back to the point, another problem with digging your way to China, is that if you get stuck along the way, instead of being stuck somewhere that you can adjust your course or take a break or rethink the line you drew, you're stuck deep in the earth, surrounded by more earth, with nowhere to go but backwards. Who enjoys that?! Sorry, but like I said earlier, I'm not perfect. I get stuck all the time. If I had to back out of my tunnel to try to dig a different tunnel, I'd have a ton of holes all over the place and no idea of where I was or where I was going.

The purpose of the lines we draw is to make a change somewhere, and move us forward in our progression as beings. We're all seeking to learn and improve our lives, and we have to draw lines in different places to do that. So don't draw straight lines all over the place! You'll wind up stuck, or boxed in, or otherwise feeling silly and like you're going nowhere.

Now for my last bit of advice.  

Don't draw too many lines all over the place!


One of my favorite games to play as a kid was what we called "The Dot Game." I don't know if there's an official name for the game, but we're going to call it "The Dot Game" for now. The game was played on a grid of dots, and the purpose of the game was to take turns drawing lines between the dots, seeking to create boxes for yourself. Now the key to this game was to be smart with the way you connected the dots, setting up your opponent to where if they put a line in the wrong place, it resulted in you getting lots of boxes from just one mistake on their part. How did you accomplish such an artful strategy? Well you had to place your lines in long stretches, all relating to each other some way. If you just draw random lines all over the place to make yourself feel like you were drawing lots of epic lines, then you wound up getting played like a two dollar banjo.

So what does this have to do with my theories about lines? Well if you draw lines all over the place, drawing them just for the sake of being able to saw "I'm drawing lines because I'm awesome!!!", then you wind up getting surpassed by everyone else who knows how to draw lines in a way that lets them relate to each other and acquires them box after box of achievements. Every line you draw should have a purpose, and should relate to the other lines that you draw, so that you get box after box and you rack up the score. If you do that, then you wind up ahead in the game, and in this instance, you wind up progressing happily through life as a skilled player of "The Dot Game of Life." (Yeah...you like what I did there.)

TL;DR
First off...if you don't know what the heading means...look it up and feel educated.

Secondly, don't get overwhelmed by this thing in life that is line drawing. Everyone has to make decisions. It's by divine design that we have the freedom to make choices for ourselves, and the ONLY way to move through life and return to our Heavenly Father as we are supposed to, is to exercise that freedom and draw lines here and there, making decision after decision to improve our lives and become everything that we are capable of becoming. It's a daunting task, and what really sucks about it is that it's a trial and error task. But it's a learning process, and as such, it is full of so many opportunities for joy and happiness at the realization that you draw the right line in the right place and are a better person because of it. I know that through this process, and with the help of a loving Father in Heaven who seeks to help us know the best places to draw lines of different kinds, we can achieve amazing things in our lives and work miracles in the lives of others, and eventually return to live with Father in a life that is perfect and eternal.

So, as usual, let me remind you that life isn't as insane as you would like to think it is. There are simple things everywhere that make life easier to understand and get through. All you have to do is learn how to see them in the right light and realize them for the sources of wisdom that they are. I hope that you can find inspiration from the crazy thoughts I come up with, and I also hope that you realize that my wisdom is not my own, but comes from he who watches and guides us all, a loving Heavenly Father.

A Bit About Perfection

Oh yeah...this one's going to be a keeper. Perfection? What is it? Is it a myth? Is it attainable? Talk about your "yes and no" questions...that one's a bigun. As a wonderful friend of mine would say..."It depends!!!" Darn right it depends. So how about when it comes to the perfect day? What is it? Well it depends. My perfect day is going to be different from your perfect day. Sorry. I hate answers like that too. Don't sweat it. But there are a few general things you have to pay attention to. Check it out.

A Perfect Day Is:

Waking up and stubbing your toe on the bag you wanted to make sure you didn't forget when you ran out of the door in the morning.

Realizing you don't have to pitch in for lunch because you left your wallet at home. (The fact that you don't have money doesn't hurt the cause either, but hey let's not get too carried away counting our blessings!)

Making notes for a lukewarm lesson in FHE to only forget them on the table as you're heading out and pulling off a totally ad lib monologue that was eloquent enough to make everyone at least look like they were enthralled.

Having a song pop up on the radio that you'd forgotten you kind of liked and put you in an AWESOME mood...conveniently right before you're about to go hang out with people.

Okay seriously though. Everyone has days that bring them down. Each and every one of us has things that bother us, or upset us, or give us reason to resent the situation we are in. Days are full of nonsense that makes you grumpy and angry and maybe even grouchy! Perhaps you had awesome plans that fell through because the person you made plans with had other plans come up. Perhaps you had an insanely long list of things that you absolutely HAD to get done today, and by noon you had to throw it out the window because there was no way you could get it all done without having some kind of epic time machine or super speed capability. (Super moms and their magic wands don't count in this conversation.) In all seriousness though, perfection is not a state of being. If you ever hear anyone say that it is, stomp on their foot and then direct them to the following statement:

Perfection is a PROCESS!!! I don't think there's a switch that can be flipped at any point and then BLAM!!! you're perfect. My religion is one of progression. This progression is Eternal. We believe that there is a plan for us, and part of that plan involves an eternal track of progression that our mortal life is only a miniscule portion of. In life we go through a process of refinement where we prepare ourselves for this eternity of progression and then if we become refined enough, we begin to learn what is needed to become just like the God that we worship. Perfection, as a state of being, is not a defined requirement to proceed on this path of progression. There was one that lived through mortality perfectly, and sacrificed himself so that we as the rest of the world, would not have to. For us, then, perfection isn't something we have to achieve. It's a process that we take part in to reach the end goal that we are after, which is to become like our Father in Heaven Himself and to return to live with him; we seek to perfect ourselves.

What does that have to do with having the perfect day? Well if you think about it, if perfection is this process by which we are doing what we can to perfect ourselves, then the perfect day, is a day in which we have done our best to work towards that goal; or to perfect ourselves. So does the perfect day have to be perfect?! Nope. (It just blew your mind how that actually made sense, didn't it?!) A perfect day can be full of shenanigans that you didn't expect; things that weren't what you planned on, or things that you didn't get done. But you do your best, don't let the little things get to you, and you can lay down at the end of the day with a smile on your face because you know that there's tomorrow, and the day after that...and the day after that. Little things will happen to you every day, often that you probably don't even realize, that will shape your day into something good. And if that happens, guess what...YOU'VE HAD A PERFECT DAY! Take a look back on the day. Did your plans fall through? What did you do instead? OH WAIT!? You mean to tell me you did laundry that had been sitting there for longer than it really should have been for any decent self-respecting person?! Coughcoughthat'sahintcoughcough. Did you sit down and finish a book that made you feel epic and awesome and inspired? (Blog in inspiration incoming...Also any Twilight books don't count for that statement.)

It doesn't matter whether or not everything was awesome during your day. There are only a few kinds of things that you can do during a day that you will look back on and go "Today sucked, I really shouldn't have done that." And guess what...there's tomorrow! And also there's repentance. Remember...Christ lived his life perfectly to overcome our imperfection. Because of his sacrifice for us, perfection then comes from perfecting ourselves as best we can and honoring that sacrifice that he made. If we do that, honestly and truthfully, he will make up the difference for what we truly are incapable of accomplishing ourselves.

The truth of the matter is, the simple things that make life wonderful (and perfect) are right there in front of you. You just have to look at them in the right light.

A Bit About A Storm

So here's the deal. You don't know everything. Neither do I. It sucks. To make matters worse, there's this lovely little thing that creeps into our lives as a natural byproduct of this lack of omniscience. It annoys us. It holds us back and tells us "Nope...bad idea..." It's called doubt. But you know what? It's a good thing. Feel free to stop and take a minute to roll your eyes or cough in surprise. I don't mind. I'm not crazy, I promise, but I also promise I'm a pretty fair expert on the topic.

WARNING: Great big, possibly cheesy metaphor incoming. Brace yourself.

Here's the thing with doubt: it's a great big storm cloud. But when you shift your focus a little, even the darkest of storms can have wonderful meaning...

I live in a place where thunder rolls and storms come in as big black clouds that darken your day and put you in a grumpy mood just because they can. Sounds pretty depressing right? Well there's also something unique about these storms that I have come to love and look forward to. Just before a storm, before the rain and lightning and commotion, there's a stillness, you know, the calm before the storm? In this calm, you can feel the storm coming in. It's not the energy crackling around you before a lightning strike or the feeling of a chill wind accompanying the storm. It's not even a foreboding feeling of impending doom as the common uses of "The calm before the storm" usually refer to. In reality, it's an anticipation of the potential replenishment. Personally, I think it's entirely possible that it springs from a plethora of life dancing at the idea that they might survive the storm and enjoy the rejuvenating nourishment that comes from a good rain. The grass, the trees, the animals, they don't know of any impending danger any more than we do. Do we know if our house is about to get struck by lightning and burn down? Nope. Could it? Maybe. Could it hail like crazy and turn our car into something that resembles more of a golf ball than a reliable method of transportation? Yup. It could. But there's plenty of time to tell a storm is coming and worry about the danger. In this brief period before the rain comes, the thought comes..."My roses could really use the extra rain..." or "It's been so hot lately, I'm glad for the cool reprieve..." I have complete faith that the plants and trees and animals have similar thoughts processes.  When you take a deep breath, and breathe in the air around you, you can perceive this calm.

Then the storm comes. That part sucks. There's no avoiding it. Anyone who's stuck outside and exposed in a storm has a bad day. Even in a car if you're driving through a good storm, you might see a little cool-looking lightning and stuff, but you're still not gonna be the happiest person on the road that day. So you weather the storm and keep going. Maybe you huddle up under a blanket and watch the pretty lightning outside the window? Or maybe you curl up in bed and pull several pillows over your head to drown out the drumming of rain on your roof while you're trying to sleep.

Eventually the storm passes. You'll wake up, or get out of your comfy spot by the fire, go have a look outside, and the storm will have passed over. And what will you find at this moment? More calm! That's right! This is the BEST part. You'd forgotten. There's a storm BEFORE the calm. (If my buddy Jake reads this he's going to have a really happy moment as soon as he reads that bit about the storm before the calm...) There may be a few isolated raindrops coming off of trees and things, some different places recovering from the fact that they didn't have as good of fortune as you, maybe the tree out front had a bad day and got zapped by lightning...but for the most part, all is well. Step outside, and take a deep breath again. It's there, a similar calm to what was there before the storm. But it's a little different this time. What's the difference? Gratification. Life around you emits an aura of peace because despite the dark cloud that came over and dropped all sorts of natural nonsense on the area, everything is still okay. Life goes on. The world around you has been nourished and survived through a storm. That's a wonderful feeling. If you're really paying attention, you can't help but smile at the wonderful feeling.

So are you having doubts about something? Is there a job you're really thinking about taking, but maybe you aren't sure if it's the right way to go? Or maybe a girl (or guy...) that you really like that you aren't sure you really want to tell about it? Well it's time for a storm again. Maybe this storm will bring a tornado with it. It's true. But maybe not? Maybe all this storm will be for you is a source of nourishment and growth. Doubt creeps in slowly, rolling thunder along the way. The threat of natural disaster looms in the air. But, if you keep going, don't let it completely cloud over your life, and take a brief moment right before you think the storm is about to hit and take a deep breath, you'll feel the calm. If you don't, doubt's gonna get the best of you, and this entire storm is going to be a miserable experience, and you'll miss all the good that comes from it. But if you do stop and feel that peace,  you'll realize all of the potential for good things ahead that spring from this storm. Maybe things will go bad. But maybe they won't and you'll wind up better off! What's the bad news? There's gonna be a storm. Some way or another the storm IS coming. All you can do is make sure you're as prepared as you can be. And then...weather the storm. Just get through it. Doubts are gonna come. Things aren't going to go as well as you thought they might. But remember that you stopped and felt that calm. Remember it's going to be okay. And guess what! The storm will pass. And when it does, look around and take in a deep breath again. You'll feel that gratification. That feeling of "I made it!" that makes life so sweet and makes achievement something so glorious to feel.

Doubt is a silly thing that bothers us, and there's nothing really that we can do about it. Sometimes it gets to us and ruins our day and before we know it the storm's passed and we're in a bad mood because there was a storm. But doubts keep us in check; they remind us that we don't know everything. They give us an opportunity to keep thinking, or to keep looking at things differently. And all we have to do, is take a second to look around at the right moments, and we see how we can overcome this thing called doubt. Using the lessons it has to teach us, we can utilize it as a reinvigorating injection of defiance and motivation. "I can do this!" is what springs from doubt when we look at it with the right point of view. And with this renewed sense of purpose we pick up speed and move that much further towards what we're out to accomplish; all because of this wonderfully obnoxious thing called doubt.

I hope you all enjoy the holidays, and keep doubt from clouding over you too much at this time when your thoughts are drawn to the things that you really care about.

And as always, remember that the simple things that make life wonderful are right there in front of you. You just have to look at them in the right light.

A Little Bit About Family

This post is dedicated to my father, whom I love dearly and has always been my hero.

It's amazing how, in life, often you find yourself on the brink of giving up. You've done everything you thought you could; you've reached the limit of what you know how to accomplish; and you can't, no matter how much thinking and pondering you do, figure out the next step to take. Some people are good at handling themselves and staying positive in these kinds of situations. I envy them. I am not one of them.

However, time and time again when I find myself on the verge of just saying "Screw it!" I'm reminded of something that I tend to take for granted: I have an amazing family that loves me and watches out for me. Over and over just when I'm in need of a pick-me-up, or in need of guidance and direction, or in need of a kick in the behind to get going again, my family has been there for me. Sometimes it's the random happy birthday call from a sister, or a brother stepping up and organizing a family get-together to say "We love you, and we want you to know how special you are to us." Every time I can think of where I've really felt lost, felt like I had nowhere forward to go, my family has been there to interject the perfect amount of wisdom or experience or warning to help me get through what I was unable  to accomplish myself.

Each of us has a family of some sort. Each of us has a different situation with our family. My family is nowhere near perfect. But I think the definition of family is people who are there for you when you need them, no matter what you're going through or have done in the past, and no matter what they're going through or have done in the past. In my last blog post I talked about friends, and they are, truly, family to me. But they cannot replace the incredible family that I have been born into.

I have been blessed with wonderful parents. They have taught me valuable things and never cease to provide wisdom and guidance at the right moments. Their example in their marriage and the way they live life is an unending source of strength to me. My mom has an incredible ability to recognize and find joy in the many tender mercies she finds herself blessed with throughout life. We have not always had everything life could give us, and yet my mom always has a way of seeing wonderful and joyful things on a day to day basis that make home a happy and wonderful place to be. My dad is a rock of strength and wisdom. He's not the most expressive person. He doesn't always give voice to his thoughts and opinions. But no matter what I've been going through, whether he approved of my actions or disapproved, I've always been able to go to him and ask for advice and guidance. Ever since I was little I can always remember being able to ask him questions about anything, big or small. If he didn't know the answer, he would point me in the right direction to obtain the answer myself. There has never been a day that I doubted his love for me, and his example is something I will always look up to.

I am blessed with wonderful siblings. They've all been through different things. They all see the world in different ways. Some days they teach me more than others, but I learn so much from them and gain so much from their examples. My place in the family as the "Runt," the little brother that was a surprise to them all, is something I enjoy and cherish. As they each see things in a different way, they shed light on different aspects in my life in their own ways, and together without often even knowing their combined influence, they provide a light for me that I would be lost without.

Not everyone is blessed with a family like mine. For some people, their family is one of the biggest struggles they face. If you are one of these people, I understand where you find yourself, and my heart goes out to you. But this post is, I feel, specifically meant for you. You especially are the ones that must be reminded that family is a treasure to be valued above all else in the world. No matter what the situation is, no matter the troubles you have with your family, there is hope. The gospel heals all wounds. Your actions and decisions affect your family more than anyone else in your life. Seek to choose the right, do your best to live up to the expectations of your Father in Heaven, and partake of the Atonement of Jesus Christ to refine yourself and become a better person, and you will feel and see the effects it will have on your family. Whether it will change the hearts and minds of your loved ones around you, or will lead you towards the opportunity to start a righteous and wonderful family of your own, the blessings of the Gospel will be impossible to miss in your life and in your family.

I am forever grateful to my family, and I only hope that I will be able to be as much of a strength and example to them as they are to me. 

Again I leave you with the best of wishes, and I leave you with my humble reminder: The simple and most important things in life are often right there, hiding in plain sight right in front of us, awaiting only our acknowledgement that they are indeed what make our lives truly grand.

The Beginning: Friendship

This my first post is dedicated to Stephanie, a dear friend.

Okay I'm not going to even come close to lying. This blog is starting because of two things: the first being that a wonderful friend of mine promised that if I started a blog she'd read it; the second is that the same friend wrote an amazing blog that I'm really appreciative of and so I feel a certain need to get revenge on her!

So I'm going to start off by stating a very important fact; something that must not be forgotten UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES no matter how long I wind up keeping this blog going and how much I write. I am a very simple guy with very simple tastes and even simpler expectations and needs from life. I'm not looking to show off my knowledge or awe anyone with my writing. If you walk away from this blog feeling uplifted and maybe a little bit inspired, then I have done my job.

Now with all of that said, my intentions with this blog are simple and straightforward. I'm a bit of a dufus, and quite often find myself missing what's right in front of my face. So just in case there are other people out there that suffer from the same problem, I'm going to try to keep a bit of a record here of things I've realized were right in front of my face. I'm going to try to point out the simple and wonderful things in my life that are important to me and bring me happiness in the hopes that maybe anyone else reading this will be reminded of the things that they have forgotten about or taken for granted. Perhaps you can learn from my mistakes and you won't have to spend as much time as I have, miserable for no better reason than that you weren't looking hard enough at how wonderful your life was.

So where to start? I've learned so much, in the last few months even, about my life and what I'm appreciate of, but I think the best place to begin and certainly what has become absolutely most important to me is the people around me. When you realize that there are people around you that you love and that love you right back, no matter how much you deserve to be punched in the face due to sheer lack of sense, life becomes quite a bit brighter. And you realize that no matter what you're going through, it'll all be okay because you have people that are going to be there with you through thick and thin and a little tiny bit further beyond that. These are the people that will come give you a hug when you really need one, with get angry with you at someone or something who has slighted you, and who will lovingly say "You know, dear, you're really being kinda stupid" when you most need to hear it.

I have a wonderful group of friends. Every day they all, each and every one of them, find new ways to inspire me and teach me new things about myself and the world around me. Some of them I've known for a very long time; others I have only recently enjoyed getting to know. But one thing I'm certain of is that it doesn't matter how long you know someone, when they love you and you love them, you're going to be friends for life. I'm so grateful for the people I have around that I know I will be able to count on for the rest of my life, and even beyond into the eternities. I have lost count of the number of times that one of them has said something, even something silly or seemingly unimportant, that has touched me or made me think about things differently and changed me in ways that are irrevocable. Without these people in my life, I would be truly lost. To all of my beloved friends out there, whether you wind up reading this or not, I send you my love and infinite gratitude. I don't know what road lies ahead for me or you, but I smile at the thought that no matter what road it is or what direction it leads, we'll get to experience it together.

To those of you who have a close group of friends, don't ever let it slip away. Do whatever needs to be done to keep it tight. Mend any rifts, forgive any wrongs, and hog-tie any stragglers and bring them back to the fold. Love is the foundation for everything. Through the love you share with your friends, your joy will grow more and more full, and you will look more and more towards the source of all that is good, a loving and kind Heavenly Father and His Son, Jesus Christ.

To those of you who don't have such a group of friends and people that you feel love you and enjoy your love... there's still good news. You have a Heavenly Father who loves you. He loves you infinitely, more than anyone in this world will ever be able to match. He loves you so much he sent His Son to atone for all of your flaws and mistakes and foibles. He sent His Son to be there to comfort you, and to lead and guide you. I bear my firm witness that as you seek to follow the Lord, he will lead you towards happiness, and he will help you find the people that you need in your life, and that may need you just as much. 

This is my testimony tonight as I close this post. I have lived and experienced the road that the Savior would have us walk to change our lives and turn misery and despair into happiness and joy. As you look for the simple and wonderful things in life, look to your friends and loved ones. Their influence will affect your life forever, and through them and the love you share with them you will find a better life and a happier existence.

Until we find our paths crossing again, I wish you the best, and remind you to always remember that the simple and most important things in life are often right there, hiding in plain sight right in front of us, awaiting only our acknowledgement that they are indeed what makes our lives truly grand.